Connect and Grow

My birthday is here again.  7th December is the beginning of my new year at a personal level. It is the time for me to celebrate life, recollect and set new resolutions. I want to thank God for the 47 years that ended yesterday. I am truly grateful for the woman I have become. I am more than aware of who I am now and ready to make positive changes going forward. I embrace and respect our African culture and  religion being  the main shapers of our belief system. Nevertheless, things and situations change. I know and have learnt more about life in the past years. My perspective and view about our deeply held traditions changed also.  I have chosen to share my new beginnings as part of my healing and thriving. Last year, I came face to face with the fact of life.  You cannot love another if you do not love SELF . Simple as it may sound; it was life-changing for me. I was raised as a woman whose role was to care and nurture others. Growing u...

" Knowing yourself is the beginning of all the wisdom " Aristotle Some years back, I went to seek counselling from the Priest at our local church. At that time, I had unexplained anxieties that were causing me depression. I did not understand why I felt overburdened with life to the point of insanity. Coming from a family with a history of mental health, I was scared that it could be the beginning of the same. During that time, I spent hours on end overthinking and processing issues that had more to do with other people’s action towards me. It was exhausting and mind-boggling.  I became very sick and could not think or sleep properly. My career was affected by the depression and the toxic work environment did not help matters either. The Priest was very sympathetic to the issues and explained that he had counselled many cases presenting similar signs. He suspected that I could have been carrying a generational CURSE. He explained that family curses are reoccurr...

Martin Luther once said," t here comes a time when silence is   betrayal ".   This week, I met a friend Anna ( not her real name). We live in the same neighbourhood in  Blantyre .   Anna was coming from buying maize meal at the market and I offered her a lift. She will turn 27 years old on 13th February 2017 and she has five children. She has been married twice. The last husband left in August   2016 .   The man was just gone the other day and has not been   seen or communicated.   Its   been 6 months now. Just like that! Anna survives by selling charcoal by the   road side in the   neighbourhood. Last   Monday ,   she had gone to buy the charcoal and found that the prices had gone up. She could only manage to buy half   of what she would normally order. It has been hard for her to fend for the children but she was still optimistic that things will get better one day .  She must make it work for the...

Life is indeed a journey. We travel far and wide. We fall along the way, dust ourselves and keep moving forward. That is part of it. Living in poverty stricken country like Malawi has  its peculiar challenges and limitations. Our cultural orientation puts a lid on what you can do, say and share. Liberating oneself from the perceptions, innuendos and sarcasms of village life is but a huge task. The majority would resign to fate. Stay where they are and close their ability to reach their potential. I am a Malawian woman who has been lucky to move from the village and work in the city. I have experienced love, joy , sadness, rejection and fear. I love my country, its people  and our culture of Umunthu. Our people are hard-working and willing to learn. We can do more to improve our living conditions. Our strength is in oneness. I have two lovely children. A boy aged 21 named Ekari ( luck) and Elapo  ( universe) a daughter  of 14  years. Together, we are b...